11 years old!!

Time really does fly by!!  My amazing niece Morgan will be 11 years old tomorrow!! How crazy is that?  I love Morgan more than she will ever know!! I was lucky to be the one that got to spend everyday with her from the time she was 2 weeks until she was 9!! Morgan is like my little sister!! The little sister that I never had!! I love her so very much!! Here are 11 things that I ABSOLUTELY love about this girl!!
11- Her laugh!! It always brings a smile to my face
10- How sweet she is to her Brothers
9- She is her Moms best friend
8- She can now cook even if it is just make Macaroni and Cheese ( okay that is the only thing she can cook)

7- I love that she is reading this over my shoulder!! Go away Morgan!!
6- I love her comebacks!! I wish I could be that quick!!
5- She still LOVES me even though she pretends she doesn't!!
4- Morgan is such a hard worker!!
3- I love that she is still dancing!! She is amazing!!
2- I love that we have our little moments when we spend time together!!
1- Morgan and I have this tradition!! We go to Beto's every morning on her Birthday!! She loves it and NEVER forgets!!

I love my little Luva Lu!! Morgan you are an amazing girl!! You have been through so much the last year and a half and you have made it through!! You are my hero and I hope you always remember that I will always be here for you! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

look what I found

 

One of my favorites!! Oh how I miss those blue eyes!!

I love you Britton to the moon and back again!!

My Best Friend!!

Jackson has gotten so big.  He is now four years old and I am his best friend.  He loves me and I have to say that I love him just as much if not more!! Every Friday night he ends up at my house and hangs out with me.  I have to admit that I love it.  I was so nervous when I stopped tending him.  I figured that he wouldn't remember me as much as the other kids would.  That he wouldn't love me as much, boy was I wrong!! I am so grateful for every chance I get to spend with this little guy!! I love that he tells everyone that I am his best friend!! I must admit, he is my best friend too!!

Change, Regrets and ME!!!

I learned something new the past couple of weeks.   Just like a new years resolution some people choose a word that they are going to imput into their lives for the new year. I have been thinking about this long and hard and I finally decided that this is something that I am going to try this year.  So here it goes, I am sharing my word with the world and my friends.  My word is ME!!  Now, I know what some of you are thinking....that this word is stupid, right?? Well for me it is the most complicated word in my vocabulary.  I am one to always put everyones needs before my own. I feel like I don't even know myself anymore.  I am not trying to toot my own horn or anything but it is the truth.  I cannot remember the last time I actually did something for myself.  Thinking about my life and where I am makes me have some regrets.  I dont want to have any regrets.  So, this year I am going to think about ME more.   I just hope I can do it.   There are a lot of things that I need to do and let go of and this is the perfect year to accomplish this.  I need to take care of myself.  That is what I have decided.  With the support of my amazing sisters and Mom I think I can accomplish my goals and think about ME more!!  I am really excited for this.  I just hope that I can do it!!
 :)

Crying, its good right?

So, I did something really stupid tonight.  I watched the video that my cousin put together for Brittons funeral.  She did an amazing job.  I haven't watched this video in 9 months.  Mostly because I cant make it through without crying like a baby.  Second, because I cant tell if they are sad tears or realizing that I am going to be okay tears.  I miss Britton so much.  I know that I say that a lot on here but I feel like this is the only way that I can say it.  Britton meant so much to me.  He was a huge part of my life and it is so hard for me to think that I am going to be okay without him.  I don't want to be okay without him.  I almost don't want to move on without him but I know that is what I need to do. Britton is looking down on me and I know that he doesn't want me to be sad.  He wants to look down and see that I am doing okay.  I will never forget my little man.  I will never forget his smile and his laugh.  I will never forget him.  I am so grateful that I get to see this video and remember all of the fun times that Britton had in his life.  I know that I will cry, but that is okay because I know that I am getting through this. 

Fall Semester!!

Tonight I turned in my last and final paper for the semester.  I took on a full load this semester and I am so grateful for the break!! This semester kicked my butt!!! I am just grateful that I made it through.  Thanks to all of those that heard me complain and had faith in me and made me keep going!! It is because of you that I survived!! Yay, I did it!!

A YEAR....

Britton and I in 2009

2nd grade picture

 Monday marked a year since Britton passed away.   Although I tried to keep myself busy at work and school it still  didn't change that fact that I had a few break downs and tears.  Man, I miss that boy, more than anyone knows.  I miss him so much sometimes I can't breathe.  I remember when I got the call that Britton had been rushed to the emergency room, I thought maybe he needed an IV or something, then they told me that he had stopped breathing and they were doing CPR, I remember everything going foggy.  I just kept thinking please, please don't let this happen but it did. I remember a lot about that night.   I still remember the smell of the room they sat us in when we got to the hospital.   I remember an old man helping me calm down and focus when we heard the news that Britton had passed away.  I will never forget the love that this stranger showed me that night. He was amazing.  I remember walking into the room and seeing Keli and Buddy.  I remember a lot of things. Little details. Some I might share another day.  But the one thing that stands out the most to me was my family.  I remember sitting there holding Brittons little hand and realizing that my whole family was in that room.  They were all there.   I am so grateful that I have a family that sticks together.  My brothers and sisters and I have been through a lot in this life.  We have lost our father and that night a son/nephew.  I think that these trials have made us stronger and closer.  I realized that night that I am a lucky girl.  I am lucky because my family is so close.  Britton has set the bar high for all of us but I know that we will all be together someday.  I will see Britton again, just like I will see my dad.  I am so grateful for the gospel and for the knowledge that I have of eternal families!! I cannot wait for the day when I get to see my Britton.  I know I will cry, but it will be tears of joy and happiness. 

Britton LOVED Harry Potter!! He was so excited when I got a wand!! This is my FAVORITE pic!!

Heaven

The past couple have days I have been thinking about how cool Heaven must be. Almost a year ago I read this book called, "The Message" By Lance Richardson, it was amazing.  When Britton passed away I was curious, curious about where he was and what he was doing.  I think that goes through everyone's mind when they lose a loved one.  This book helped me and was what I really needed at the time. It is about a Man who suddenly goes into a coma. While he is in this coma he visits Heaven.  He explains the way he felt, the scenery, how peaceful and calm it is.   I am actually jealous of all of my loved ones that are there. How awesome would it be to not have any stress or worries. 

 I really like this quote! The first time I saw it was a year ago.  Keli got it on a tile just after Britton had passed away!!  It helped me in a time when I thought the world was ending.  I know that Britton is in heaven and that he is safe and sound.  I am so grateful for the little piece of heaven I feel each day!! Without that, I wouldn't know what to do.

Shoes

Britton's shoes that he left on the front porch last Thanksgiving

 My sweet nephew Britton passed away almost a year ago.  I just wanted to share a little bit about this amazing boy because he was someone that you could never forget.  Britton loved hot dogs and corn dogs.  I used to play a song called "Corn dogs" by Ryan Shupe and the Rubber band.  He would sing it at the top of his lungs.  Once he told me that he thought that song was made made just for him.  Britton was smart, silly, and happy.  There were three different types of Britton.  Happy, Sad,and Mad Britton.  Everyday, the minute he woke up, you knew which Britton you were going to get that day.  :)  Britton loved his toys.  He always knew where every single toy that he owned was,  at all times.  I remember one time he dropped a Dinosaur at our cabin.  He insisted a year later that we go look for it and he knew right where he dropped it. He loved his bike, policemen and fire fighters. Britton was a very giving person.  He would always make sure his brothers and sister were taken care of before he would do anything for himself.  Britton loved his cousins and family.  He loved his Mom and was his Dad's best friend.  Britton loved his Sponge Bob footy pajamas along with his cowboy boots.  Britton loved being a cowboy.  Last year at this time, he would come home everyday change into his cowboy outfit, complete with vest and boots.  Britton loved jokes and making people laugh.  His favorite joke was, What did the beaver say to the other beaver........shut the dam door!! I don't know what was more funny, the joke or the fact that he couldn't tell it without laughing.  

Britton and his BEST FRIEND

These are only a few things on the list of things that I love about Britton.  I miss him more than anyone could ever know. This past year has been the most trying year of my life. I never imagined that I would lose a nephew/son in my life. Britton was like mine.  I was with him almost everyday since he was born.   Keli always said that there was something about Britton that made him special. I always believed it too.  He was such an amazing little kid and I can only imagine the accomplishments he is making in heaven.  I am so grateful for the plan of salvation and eternal families.  Britton placed the Bar very high when he passed away.  But I know I will be with him again one day.  Britton, you are my hero, I miss your smile, your laugh, and just YOU!! I hope you are proud of all of us here on earth. I am sure proud of you. Love Stacy 

Hey

Wow it has been a while. This past year has not been a fun one!!  So many things have happened. I am hoping to spend some more time on here. To let people know how I am really doing and for me to vent some stuff.  This is a short post but I will be back. Hope that is okay!!

Temple Square!!!

Jillian is the most amazing cousin and best friend a girl could ask for!! She knows me inside and out. We are two of a kind! This year for my Birthday she gave me something that i will never forget.  I was told that I needed to save Saturday October 15 th just for her, so I did.  When she got to my house that morning I knew whatever we were going to do would be fun because she was so excited!! She told me that the surprise was a day at Temple Square! I was super happy!! You see, The Salt Lake Temple is my favorite.  I have always wanted to go to Temple Square and take my time, look at the pictures,watch the movie, walk around the temple, and feel the spirit.  So this gift was amazing to me!!  When Jillian and I get together there is never a dull moment!! The whole ride up we sang Taylor Swift at the top of our lungs and laughed and just had an all around fun time!! Walking around Temple Square was amazing!! Looking at the paintings and reading the stories and being close to the Temple was something that I needed.  For dinner she made reservations at the top of the Joseph Smith building at the Restaurant called. The Roof!!! Oh my, it was so amazing and yummy.  Plus the view was incredible!!!  A Perfect way to end the day!!

A lot of people might think that this would be a silly present! That its something stupid! But for me it meant everything........it was PERFECT! I will never forget this day for the rest of my life!! Jillian, thanks so much for this gift!! I will always remember it!! I love you!!

GRANDMA HIATT

On Wednesday September 14th, 2011, my cute little Grandma Hiatt passed away.   I am going to miss this lady so much. She was my best friend.  I got to spend  a lot of time with Grandma and I will never forget all the talks and laughs that we have shared. She was my beautious Grandma and I was her Girl. I love you so much Grams, and I will miss you forever!!  Happy Trails Grams!!!

My Weekend with The Johnson Kids :)

I have had so much fun this weekend that I just had to write about it! I had the opportunity to watch my Brother Riley's kids while he and his wife Stephanie went to Moab to run a marathon! I have had so much fun since day one! Clayton, Addisyn, Brynlee and Oakley are amazing!! 

Our weekend started with a phone call to the police. Clayton was riding his bike and got bit by a dog.  All of you that know me, know that I am terrified of dogs. So in my head I was freaking out. Not Clay, he was and is completely fine. The dog didn't even break the skin. My sister Becky thought, just to be on the safe side, that we had better report it!  The Police came and we gave a report and  that was it!! The kids thought it was so cool that the Police were there!! But luckily that was the only eventful thing of the weekend!! 

Yesterday we spent the day with family!!  Cousins, cousins, and more cousins!! :) Then of course I had to take them to McDonald's.  I am the best Aunt ever, according to Bryn and Addi!! Brynlee had to bring home her Happy Meal Box and keep it so she could show her Mom!!  She is the cutest thing ever!!  We also  had Jilllian come with finger nail polish and that made the girls day! Thanks Jillian for spending time with me and painting all of their cute little fingers and toes!!

Oakley is so funny!! At the first of the weekend she didn't want anything to do with me!! But by today I am her best friend!! I love it!! She actually woke up this morning excited to see me! She keeps yelling Mama Sace! So cute!! She has the cutest little smile!! I just love her! 

Today we are having a Movie Popcorn lazy day!! I brought all of my kid movies and these kids are in heaven! I think that Addi is enjoying it the most!! She says its the perfect way to wait for her Mom and Dad to get home!! :)

I am the luckiest Aunt in the world!! I honestly have loved this weekend!! Thanks Riley and Steph for trusting me with your kids! They are amazing!  

 

CHANGE....

I will be the first one to tell you that I hate CHANGE!!!  Its hard, its emotional, and some of the time it is something that I am not a fan of.   A lot has happened to me since my last post.  Let me fill you in on a couple of things!

My Sister Keli decided that she was going to quit her job and be a Mom! I am so proud of her and her decision.  Her kids couldn't be happier and honestly I am excited for her but scared, because for me that means CHANGE.  After nine years of being her Nanny it is still to hard to let go! Keli and Buddy have always been there for me.  Keli is an amazing sister and friend! I don't know what I would do without her! She has a good heart and she is an AMAZING Mom!  Buddy is my brother and in some ways a father figure, he always watches out for me.  They both told me I could still live with them so I took them up on the offer.  I think I need time to let go.  But I still miss those kids everyday!! I miss Morgan.  Taking her to dance,  how she sings when she listens to her Ipod thinking that no one can hear her. I just miss her!  I miss Britton and his Cleaver thoughts, his smile and his laugh!  I miss Tyler and the time we got to spend together. He is my bud.  I miss Jackson, his kisses and his hugs! These are the things that I miss everyday!  I know that I still get to see them at night but it isn't the same. But a part of me knows that it is the way it should be.  Morgan loves that her Mom gets to make the decisions now. Britton is just happy because now Mom gets to watch him play sports or ride his bike. Tyler loves it because now Mom gets to pick him up everyday.  And of course Jackson has turned into a Mamma's Boy!!  That's the way it should be!!

With Keli being home the reality hit that I needed to find a job and fast.  One week went by and I got a Job!! Wow, right? ha ha Honestly, I am so grateful that I could find a job so quickly that I love!  I am a Kindergarten Aide at a local Charter School and I love every minute of it!  The Teacher I work with has become a new friend, the parents that come and volunteer are amazing and fun, and the students are so cute!! They actually like me. Being in the classroom and helping them with their work and seeing their faces when they know what the answer is,  has made me realize that this is what I want to do!  I want to teach! So, now for the next couple of years school is where I will be. And I like that Idea.

Change is hard and stupid but also good!  As much as I hate it I am grateful that it happened or Keli wouldn't be with her kids as much as she is now and that makes it all worth it, It makes me HAPPY!!  And Me?? I am okay! Live is full of change and I better get used to it! I am just proud of myself for venturing out of my box. (I love my box!) :)

DANCING QUEEN!!!

Morgan has been our little dancer this year! She has taken dance over at Center Stage for years and last year she was picked up to be on the PeeWee Company! She has LOVED that she could compete and dance more and more! Morgan just finished tryouts for this next year and made the Petite Jazz Company! She is so excited for September!! I am so PROUD of Morgan for the amazing little girl that she is!! I love you LUVA LOU and I cant wait to see you dance this next year!!

Here are some Pictures of her Competitions and Dance performances this year!!

TYLER IS 5!!!

I know that I am CRAZY behind but I couldn't for get about Tyler's Birthday!!



Tyler turned 5 on May 5th!! I cannot believe that this little guy is already 5!! For his birthday we went to Ihop and had his favorite....PANCAKES!! Tyler also got to have Ice Cream and we sang to him!! He got the best presents ever and of course as Tyler would say.......... I LoVe them!! :) Tyler is an AMAZING little BOY!! Here are 5 things that I love about TY!!






1- He lets his MOM call him T-BABY, even when he is playing ball!!!


2- He LOVES to play sports, especially SOCCER!!


3- He's our little Rowley from 101 Dalmations........I'm hungry Mother, I'm Hungry!! So cute!!


4- He Loves that Britton and Jack and Morgan are his best friends!!


5- He has the cutest smile and laugh!!


Of course the list can go on and on!! I love Ty, he has a way of bringing a smile to your face!! Happy Birthday Tyler Ryan!!

BEST CHRISTMAS PRESENT EVER!!!

Christmas morning I got the best Christmas Present ever!! Keli , Buddy and their kids handed me an envelope with Michael Buble Tickets!! I can not express how excited and happy and in shock I was!! So on March 30, 2010 Keli and I headed to the E Center and after a Rockstar (Keli needed one) and a water for me. We headed into the concert!! I could not believe our seats, 2nd row on the side of the stage!! I was so close and super excited! Naturally 7 Opened up for them. If you have never heard of these guys you need to check them out!! They were incredible! The perfect way to start off the night!! Then it was Michaels turn........Oh I am in LOVE!!! He has the best voice and did I mention he is gorgeous......He is gorgeous!! He sang All of my FAVORITES and I didn't want the night to be over!!

I just want to tell Keli thanks so much for thinking of me when you heard he was coming!! I honestly think it was the BEST PRESENT I have ever had!! Good Luck topping it next year!!

Here are only a few of the many pictures I took!!

Cruise!!

I know I am 3 Months late but I was looking at some Pictures of my Cruise and I had to share them!! I cannot believe that it was 3 Months ago!! It was so much fun and I cannot wait to go on another one!!

Sunday-board the ship- We are here and ready for some fun!!

Jillian reading the itinerary!!

Our CABIN!!! Home Sweet Home for the next week!!

Getting ready for some fun!!

Monday- Bahamas!!!!

The ATLANTIS RESORT!!! BEAUTIFUL!!! Paradise Island!!

Our Cruise ship!!

Fort Fincastle!!

This is called the Queens Staircase!! It was beautiful!! It was the only way out of the fort!! Lindsey and Jillian!! Chillin in our room after a long day walking around the Bahamas!!

We had a drill!! We had to put on our life jackets and meet at a certain point, so of course we took some silly pictures after!!

I couldn't stop looking at the water!! It was so freaky and awesome!! :)

Tuesday - Sail Day!! We decided to go to the top deck and lay out!!

Our cute toes!!!

Never lay out on day 2 of a cruise otherwise you will end up like me and Jillian and be miserable the rest of the trip!! Ouch it hurts to remember it!! Waiting for the show to start!! Nate and Linds!! I love these two!!

Wednesday- Jamaica!! I took this Picture from our cabin window!! Going back to the ship!! I had to snap this Picture!! Waiting to leave Jamaica!! We had so Much fun here!! Hiking Duns River Falls was the best!! Ya Man!! Jillian got to dance with the waiter on Italian Night!! Thursday- Grand Cayman Islands!! This is the Cruise Ship.......The COSTA FORTUNA!!!!! After Frying ourselves on day 2.... this is how we had to lay out the rest of the trip!! (don't kill me Jilian for Putting this on here) The water was so clear!! I loved this Place!! The Cayman Islands were BEAUTIFUL!! I think this was the Prettiest Place on the trip!! The Elton John Impersonator!! He was so good!! One of my Favorite shows of the week!! Best Treat EVER!!! Friday- Cozumel Mexico!! Shopping in Cozumel Mexico!! It was so fun!! I got a bracelet made for Morgan and of course a Magnet and some Playing cards!! Linds and Nate got the Most beautiful Hand Painted Bowl!! After shopping we went Snorkeling!! I LOVED it!! I took this when we headed back to the ship. A storm was on its way! Luckily we made it to the ship before it started pouring!!
Once again waiting for the show to start!! Jillian and I wanted to get these drinks when we first got on the ship...better late then never and they were so Yummy!!

Saturday- Sail day- We spent most of the day in the cabin reading and stayed out of the sun!! I didn't like that we had to leave the next day....Bright and Early!!

Lindsey asleep at the Airport!! It was a fun week but I think we were all excited to get home!!

I had so much fun on this Cruise!! I think it is the best way to take a vacation! I loved that I got to spend time with Nate and Linds and Jillian!! Thanks so much guys for letting me come on your vacation. I will NEVER forget all the fun that we had!! Love you!!